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My First 2 Weeks of High School: Staring Down the Fear

(these are definitely some of my favorite pictures from vacation... they were taken on the Hunting Island State Park beach during a Sunday morning sunrise)

Hi everyone! I hope you're having an amazing day!!

First of all:

I know. I'm sorry. It's September. And I'm still posting pictures from July. You were warned!

And second of all:

I finished my first 2 weeks of high school!!! Honestly, during Opening Weekend I no joke felt like this would never come. These first 2 weeks were really a test of my faith. And also yes, I'm probably overreacting to simply starting 9th grade. But hey! This is literally the moment that girls dream of since elementary school! And it happened! To me!

Jeez. Okay. So I'll just tell you the main points I've learned spiritually through high school so far, not all the small details that really won't come in handy to you ever, like how to get to the library and where the nearest bathroom is if you're in the auditorium. (hint: down the hallway and through the Living Room ;))

As is typical for me, I had very high expectations for high school at GT (if you don't get what GT is, just click here) and, as is typical for the world, the reality was much different. Don't get me wrong, GT is amazing! Like I've never been to a school where there's literally an ICE CREAM BAR 24/7. (well... and the million dollar facilities, dorms for boarders, arts buildings, etc. but you should know MY priorities by now) It's a beautiful campus and I'm sure it will become a second home, but obviously starting a new school at a new place with basically all new people is always going to be stressful at first. Right now I'm trying to focus on learning how to see the good in what's happening to me. (well... for me... read on and you'll understand.)

First off, (I feel like I've said that a dozen times in this post, but for real this time) a few weeks ago I started a book called Live Fearless by Sadie Robertson, and it's sooo good! I think that God placed that book in my life exactly when He knew I would need it. It talks all about how to push past the fear of whatever you're going through to recognize the beauty of what God's doing with your life. How perfect. I feel like (and I'm 100% guilty of this too) sometimes we get so wrapped up in what's going on in our lives, and let's face it - it's easier to recognize the bad things than the good - that we forget to look at our lives from God's perspective. I've heard the saying, "nothing happens to you, it happens for you" and I think that's completely true. That tough thing you're going through, in my case high school, is going to benefit you in some way. I promise. Maybe it won't be the most noticeable benefit, but it'll be there. Maybe it'll expose you to some cool opportunity. Or help you to get a deeper faith in God. Or maybe it'll just make you a stronger person.

In the book, Sadie says, "to live fearless does not mean trying to find a way to make things not scary. It means looking the scary things in the eye and staring them down because God is in you and He is bigger than fear."

Jeez did that hit me hard. I realized what I had been doing wrong. For so long I had been trying to make things not scary, trying to find a way to convince myself that I could do it alone, without pausing to think that maybe it wasn't about finding a way around the fear, maybe it was about finding courage to literally stare the fear down. And where better to find that courage than in the Creator! The one who literally created the universe can easily stare down a world history test! Heck, He can even stare down my midterm! He literally will stare down fear for us... all we have to do is ask.

Now, the first time I read this I only really applied it to the next day and the tiny troubles that I was currently facing. But if you think about it, we can call on God anytime for anything! He's on call 24/7 - just like the ice cream bar I mentioned earlier! I've taken to just saying a little prayer to myself, something about God being in me and giving me courage. I just try to remember that God sees and understands the little things that we're going through and the pain we're feeling, but He also sees the bigger picture. He sees how much these things are going to benefit us later, make us stronger people, or just prove to ourselves that we are capable of doing amazing things.

Okay, wow that was long! I kinda went off there! This is one of those things that seems super powerful and life changing in my head, but I can't always convey that correctly, so I hope that you understand what I'm saying.


God is in you.

He sees what you're going through.

He's going to give you the courage to stare down the fear you're feeling.

All you have to do is ask.

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